Seger Signs, Seals, Star Wars Stint - Shuns Saginawian Sioux

  Robert Clarke Seger, known to his friends as 'Clarkie' announced a surprise deal with The Star Wars 2011 Tournament committee.  What the deal comprises is unknown.  When the deal takes effect and expires has not been revealed yet.  Who actually proposed and accepted the deal is a mystery.  Still, SW2k11 Emperor Mark A. 'Firedog' Ewing told the assorted press who were not covering a minor skirmish in Egypt that this is the biggest thing since Boba Fett met Jar-Jar Binks in a cage match during the 2009 Star Wars Tournament.
  "What this means is...Seger is mine...bottom line..." Ewing mentioned while motioning stormtroopers to keep veteran SW Coach Tony Signore from vomiting on the podium.  Despite Signore's cries of "More Bhut", and "Mmmmhphhhp...these skittles are making me thirsty," Ewing proceeded with detailing the deal that he had dealt.
  "Who amongst you have not seriously thought about purchasing a human being, much less one of Clarkie's calibre?  I mean, when one plus one equals...uh...two, then three MUST be the truth...that's just elementary logic." Ewing spouted whilst Signore's own stormtroopers attempted to gather the empty peanut shells surrounding Ewing's podium (apparently the shells can be traded for valuable prizes at a kiosk somewhere aboard the "Death Star").

  When some of the gathered masses pointed out how eerily Clarke Seger resembled Emperor Ewing, Signore blurted out between sputters:  "He's your FATHER, Luke!", which drew many quizzical glances from the remaining cleaning crew.